Tips on Being Really Present to Your Teen or Preteen Girl

It’s not easy parenting a preteen or teenage girl. It’s not easy being one, either. For the girl, it’s an emotional stage of growth, and for the parent or caregiver, it can be very trying. But there’s also potential for increased closeness and intimacy; after all, she’s growing older, and she understands more, and your relationship with her can develop into something beautiful and more mature. Daughters are such gifts, especially when this happens.

What does she need from you? How are you able to give it? These are questions that are unique for each person, but there’s a common thread here. All people have an emotional need for intimacy. In children, this need is first and foremost met by the parents. As children grow older, their siblings and extended family contribute in this process. Friends become more important as the child grows older. By the time girls enter their teen years, their friendships are usually vitally important to them.

But does this mean their need for parenting diminishes? No, not at all. They need us just as much, but in a different way. They need support, encouragement, boundaries, listening, and of course, love. How does this differ from their earlier years? How do we change our parenting to meet the needs of an older child?

Being present is important, and that can take different forms. Maybe going online with your preteen and watching that new movie trailer that she can’t wait to see. Or spending time as she shows you her latest Minecraft invention. Or looking into her eyes and really trying to listen as she tells you about her latest science project or bus episode; not trying to fix it; just listening with love. Everyone needs to be listened to, and this is one way to show someone you are there for them. It can mean silently taking over the kitchen when something explodes in the microwave and she bursts into tears, or not criticising when she knows she’s made a mistake. Or how about apologizing when we’ve made a mistake and trying to do better next time? Or thanking her when she helped her little sister so you could get your work done?

Discipline, yes, but also kindness. Speaking in a kind tone of voice when we delineate the chores she needs to do, instead of making it sound like a list of demands. Then throwing out a positive comment here and there as she does those chores, especially before we need to make a correction.

Things like this require effort on the parents’ part, and maybe some sacrifice.

It’s so easy to get caught up in day-to-day stress that we can forget what’s really important. Teens girls often like to talk at inconvenient times, like when we want to go to bed, or as we are getting in the car to go somewhere. If we can’t listen right then, maybe we can give them a time we can. It’s a question of mutual respect and balance.

If our girls get the emotional support they need from home, they will be much more equipped to handle their teen world, and much less likely to seek that support from sources that might not be good for them. As parents and caregivers, this should be near the top of our priority list. And a little reminder from time to time is a good thing.

We believe our girls are gifts, even during the sometimes stormy teen and preteen years. At, we strive to support parents and caregivers in the parenting process. Our girls comforters sets are an easy way to help create a beautiful and nurturing home environment for your teen or preteen girl.

Body Language Makes a Difference When You Present

Body language consists of several different elements:

  • Posture: how you stand
  • Facial expressions: whether you’re smiling or frowning, or just looking like a deer in the headlights
  • Eye contact: if you’re looking at people in the audience without ignoring any part of the room
  • Gestures: what you’re doing with your hands
  • Movement: what you’re doing with your body (are you nervously pacing, or doing a little dance with your feet?)
  • Voice – how you project, how fast you’re talking, how much you enunciate, how you vary your voice

Your body language should tell the same story as your words. So when you’re trying to develop and demonstrate confidence, your body should help you rather than undermine that. And the first step is to become aware of your body language.

For example, I had one client who was completely unaware that as he presented, he rolled his sleeves up and down. So I said to him at the end of a presentation, “Do you know what you’re doing with your hands?” and he said, “No.” And I said, “Look at your sleeves. One’s up and one’s down!” And he said, “Did I do that?” My response was, “Yes, you did. And until we can fix this, wear short sleeves.”

Sometimes you’re so worried about what you’re going to say or you’re so nervous that you don’t realize that you are sending a message that undercuts your authority. If you’re in front of an audience and you don’t make eye contact, and you’re not sure what to do with your hands and your voice is really soft, you are not conveying confidence.

And if your words are fine, but your body language isn’t, the audience gets confused, and they must just believe the body language, “Well, you know, she said X but she didn’t sound too sure of herself, so I’m not sure we need to go with that.”

Once you become aware of it, you can work on improving it while still keeping it natural and unstilted. Think of body language as a means to communicate your message, rather than an end in itself.

So the next time that you have to present, make sure your body language tells the same story and doesn’t undermine your message.

Credit Card Debt Negotiation – What You Can Do to Negotiate Lower Interest With Your Creditor

Credit card debt negotiation has become essential when the borrower is unable to pay the requisite dues within a stipulated time. Negotiation can be defined as an art of settlement between two or more parties. Striking successful negotiation plays an integral part in an era of globalization. Negotiation has played an important role from times immemorial. An effective negotiation will definitely go a long way in helping the defaulters to overcome their financial crisis. Lower interest rate charged by the lender can be successfully arrived at if one approaches the debt settlement agencies.

The negotiation companies skillfully manage to convince the credit card company on behalf of the borrower to lower the entire dues to such an extent that it is beneficial to both the parties. The lender now realizes that if he does not pay heed to the debt relief company then it will be a loss to him. The consumer has reached a saturation point where he is not in a position to repay the entire amount along with accrued interest. He may also opt for filing of bankruptcy as a last resort. Thus, the creditor will not get anything. In such a situation, the smart option for the lender is to go in for a credit card debt negotiation process whereby he will be able to recover a substantial amount of his dues.

An expert helping hand is needed because you are not aware of the loopholes you might face if you handle the process of negotiation yourself. The expertise requires a professional who will fetch you out of your financial disaster whirlpool. The negotiation process requires you to be a little knowledgeable. You should have sound knowledge of what amount you owe, the interest accrued on it, to which you have to pay, along with their charges. Maintain an accurate account of what you have borrowed and the amounts to be paid on the borrowings. Things will brighten up a bit if you are aware of your financial standings. Negotiation can bring about an immediate relief provided if you keep on asking for a viable solution. One of the ways by which you can pay in monthly installments is by asking for a favor from your creditors. Explain that you are willing to clear off your debt as soon as possible but that can be achieved only if a lower interest rate is charged.

The credit card debt negotiation proves its utility and thus this facility can be availed of by one who has landed himself in high debts.